5 Ways to Break Into Your House When You Get Locked Out

Before we get to this important subject, I'd like to talk about my blog in general. If you go back and read the first few posts, you might notice that I tried to go for the "I'm a cute Mormon and I do all kinds of cute crafts and I adore my husband and life is perfect!" (or something along those lines). However, I realised that that is totally not me. Those posts were hard to write! So instead I've started working on just typing stuff that hopefully people like. (PS- I'm not trying to bash cute Mormon mommy blogs. I actually really love reading them! I just can't read them when I'm swamped with homework and I have dirty dishes coming out my ears and I haven't brushed my teeth in three days because then I feel really crappy about my life. I just have a difference of opinion on what can be posted on blogs... which is why I feel no shame in posting rants about things that bother me. )


Here's the problem: The context of my writing has changed, but the blog layout hasn't. Therefore my blog still looks cute and adorable, but the writing isn't always cute and adorable. (I mean, I just told you that I don't brush my teeth for days when I'm drowning in homework.) I came up with only a few options to remedy this problem:
1. Change back to a default template. The problem is that to me, this is boring and amateur... if I can figure out how to put a premade background onto my blog, this option becomes pointless.
2. Look around for another background and use that. I've tried this option. It's more difficult than you think (either that or I don't know how to use Google). All the backgrounds I could find would have made my blog even more cutesy and crafty, or they would have turned my blog into a Myspace profile filled with loud colors and obnoxious things like naked women and fire.
3. Figure out how to make my own blog layout. I've seen this done, and it's rather nice-looking and unique. However, I don't know how to do this. Perhaps I shall have to ask the Husband-Man.



And now, back to our previously-scheduled post...


The other day I walked home from campus only to find the door was locked. Every once in a while I'll plan on coming home earlier than usual for whatever reason (yesterday it was because my visiting teachers were coming) and so we'll leave the door unlocked so I can get in. (The smartest thing to do would be to copy our single house key...) While we were away, however, the maintenance man finally showed up to look at our dishwasher that's been broken for a week. He was very polite, and decided to lock the door for us, which meant I was left on the porch in the bitter weather trying to figure out what to do. So to keep you from having the embarrassment of having the renter people come and let you into your house.


5 Ways to Break Into Your House When You Get Locked Out


1. If your windows are unlocked, the easiest thing to do is to pull the screen out of the window and climb in. However, there is a catch to this (besides not leaving your windows unlocked...): it helps to know how to remove the screen so you can open the window. I am one of the poorly uneducated, and after clawing at the screen in vain I therefore had to resign to waiting for the renter people.


2. Dig a hole into the basement. You know, like in the cartoons, where they dig under the wall and pop up in the house? That totally would have worked. Plus, you'd then have a fabulous outdoor entrance to your cellar/basement. For those of you living in higher levels of apartment complexes, (meaning not the ground floor,) you'll have to try another option.


3. Another option is to pick the lock. This can be done in a variety of ways, including using bobby pins, your super secret mind powers, an actual lockpick set, or dynamite. Pick your poison.


4. Another way is to climb down the chimney... but a lot of houses don't have chimneys. If your option is to come through the roof, however, you could always try sawing a hole in the ceiling. As they say in Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame, "Better to beg forgiveness than ask permission." Your landlord will understand.


5. These things can always be planned for in advance. To make sure that you always will be able to get into your house no matter what, plan for another top-secret entrance somewhere within decent walking distance. Then that entrance will have a special lock that you'll always have the key for (so long as you don't lose it.) Then you won't have to worry about copying house keys, and you can feel like batman or some super top-secret agent every time you enter your house.